When has it become acceptable in society for a dad who is active in his children‘s life to be put down?
Earlier today I read this post about a man who took a picture of himself doing his daughter’s hair and posting it online and how he received positive and negative comments.
I was happy to read the positive comments but the negative comments stood out the most because like him I am a dad who does his kids hair and I am also a Black dad. The comments were so ignorant.
While reading his post it made me think of different situations those of being a Black dad in society and just being an active involved dad in my kids life.
First I’d like to say that I don’t believe in gender roles or double standards. I treat my kids equally and my wife and I agree that our roles as husband and wife are equal. Just like she is working at home and I work outside of our home we have switched before and I have been the at home dad and she worked outside the home. So if she can do anything for our kids I can too.
I remember being at an amusement park in California and my daughter wanted her hair put into a ponytail. It was hot and we were outdoors standing in a line. So I told my wife I would do it and the lady behind me said “I don’t believe this, I’m going to have to see this! He is going to knot her hair up” I gave a laugh while my wife said “He’s better at it than I am”
With no hesitation, I grabbed my daughter’s hair tie and put it into a ponytail. I could feel the lady watching. After I was done I said to the lady “it’s only a ponytail and I do her hair all the time.”
Later it made me think what made this complete stranger think I wasn’t able to take care of my daughter’s hair? Was it because I’m a guy? Was it because I’m a black male? That’s when I figured it was probably both. Sadly there are so many negative stereotypes connected with being a black dad that are not true. I know many black dads who are very active in their children life’s and take care of them.
I am happy I am able to blog about it here now on GUB because I do want to have a positive voice for dads but especially Black Dads.
I leave you with a picture of me doing little lady’s hair much like I always do but this time I post it in support of Doyin Richards of Daddy Doin’ Work who like me is a black dad with mixed children.